Frequently Asked Questions - FAQs

It’s best to avoid items that are not aligned with Jewish values or that the family may not use (e.g., non-kosher food or religious items from other faiths). If you’re unsure, a heartfelt card with a small gift or donation is always appreciated.

Absolutely! Personalized gifts, books, artwork, or something tied to the child’s interests or future are all wonderful choices.

Gifts are customary but not required. The most meaningful gift is your presence at the celebration. If you choose to give a gift, it is often something meaningful or traditional.

If you’d like to give a monetary gift, the amount varies based on your relationship with the family and your own comfort level. Generally:

• Peers & Friends: $18–$54
• Extended Family & Close Friends: $54–$180
• Immediate Family: $180+

If you’re attending the celebration, it is customary to bring the gift to the party. If you’re unable to make it to the celebration but will be attending the service, gifts can also be brought to the synagogue since the service will be on a Thursday and not on Shabbat (the Sabbath).

If you were invited as a guest of one of the celebrants, you are not expected to bring a gift for the other. However, a small gesture or card acknowledging both can be thoughtful but is not expected nor required.

Common gifts include:

• Money in multiples of 18 (symbolizing “chai,” the Hebrew word for life).
• Judaica (e.g., a Kiddush cup, candlesticks, or a mezuzah).
• Books, particularly those related to Jewish history, ethics, or values.
• Charitable donations in the celebrant’s honor.
• Personalized or sentimental gifts.

In Jewish tradition, the number 18 represents “chai” (חַי), meaning “life.” Giving money in increments of 18 (e.g., $18, $36, $54) is considered a way to wish the recipient a life of good fortune and blessings.